The story behind the items that I had highlighted were Elementary, Mexican, and CIS History is a little but some are similar to one another.
For starters I had highlighted Elementary because it was the very first place that I remember where I learned how to write. Before that, words were just things we spoke or listened to. They were moving conversations or caught up in stories that were being told to me. It was my kindergarten class where the teacher is trying their very best to teach us how to write the letters of the alphabet to learn how to spell our name. Within those years writing was a way of making sense of the world around me, learning how to form simple sentences, piecing together letters to make words, and which those words will turn out to be thoughts on paper. Learning how to write was like a puzzle and with each new piece I learned that to start to understand the bigger picture of how language works. Writing became a way to connect the scattered thoughts in my head, to make them something to share with my classmates and teacher. For me it wasn't just getting the spelling things right or grammar, it was about learning another language to communicate with my peers and helping my parents throughout our lifetime, and having a connection with others.
I would say that the relationship between writing and language was something that I began to appreciate more as I grew older. At first, writing was a task such as an assignment in class. But over time, I was able to realize that writing wasn't an obligation, it was a given opportunity. I didn't realize when I was younger until I got older but there are so so many kids that aren't given the opportunity to write or to even learn many basic things like some kids these days. Beginning to write gave me the opportunity to create my own stories. I started to notice the power of words, how they can express emotions, paint pictures to adults that might be able to understand a five year old's handwriting, or change how a five year old sees the world or even a specific person.
Language was quite a challenge since I had grown up speaking Spanish, but when language was being written down it became a reflection of who I was and how I thought. Elementary years of learning how to write were like learning how to express myself in a way that went beyond just talking. Talking was more immediate but when it came to writing it was something that stuck. It meant that I could leave a mark, no matter how small but could last. That idea stuck with me as I kept writing, and it still does to this given moment.
Learning how to write in elementary school was the beginning of a longtime love hate relationship with language. It taught me that writing wasn't just putting words on a page, it was finding my younger voice, understanding my thoughts, and making them matter. Language became a bridge between me and the world. Having the ideas and the way I could communicate them to others. Elementary school writing may seem like a very small step but younger me it was just the beginning of everything that would come after.
Second word that I had highlighted was Mexican. Being Mexican has always been a great source of pride but it also comes with its complications especially when it comes to writing. The relationship when it comes to language and identity was beyond challenging at a very young age. Growing up, Spanish was my primary language, the language of my family. As I became more involved in writing, I found myself navigating English more and more, especially in academics. It had felt like there was an unspoken expectation that I would be successful as a writer, so I embraced english. Yet, every time I wrote in English, part of me felt distant, as if I was leaving behind my culture. It was hard for me to reconcile that feeling and the thoughts flowed more naturally in Spanish while I had thought the world seemed to demand that I should express myself in another language. One of the turning points was in middle school where I was asked to read out loud in English, afterwards, someone asked me if I had ever written anything in spanish. They seemed surprised that I haven't shared some work in spanish. That comment stuck with me because it reminded me of something that I've been engaging with: the fear of writing in Spanish or embracing more of my Mexican culture in my work would somehow limit my work less. It felt like I was being asked to choose between two parts of myself. Later I realized both languages and identities represented who I am.
This struggle pushed me to comfort the depper challenge of writing as a Mexican at an all white school. It wasn't just choosing a language to write about, it was more about expressing both languages. My challenge has been to find a way to balance to allow both Spanish and English to write. Being able to claim my voice in a way that felt true to who I am. When entering middle school it was hard to express myself since I would think in spanish but I wouldn't know how to express myself in english to write out. I would be jealous of others that could express themselves very easily. Writing, for me, has become an act of resistance and resisting the pressure to conform from one language to the other. In many ways the language I grew up speaking Spanish at home doesn't fully align with expectations in classrooms where English is prioritized. Like I mentioned before, when it comes to writing sometimes it feels unreal since I really can't express myself. Having to always translate spanish to english mixes me up and it intends to fall behind some of my classmates. Throughou

t middle school I felt that the school system doesn't acknowledge how deeply language and identity are tied together. There's been challenges with content. In school I would often feel like what would be considered “good” writing doesn't fully reflect my own experiences as a Mexican. When we were asked to write an essay or story the theme that came into my head was growing up between the two cultures. Didn't really seem to fit into the framework that was being taught. It feels like I'm constantly having to adjust my voice to meet the expectations.
Lastly the word that was highlighted was CIS History. The course that has benefited me the most throughout high school is CIS History. The reason behind that is it being a hard class but has taught me many things. It has physically and mentally prepared me for a college class. Being thrown so many assignments not only that all the exams/tests were a lot that was thrown at us. Having to manage to find ways to get done was something that I am still surprised that I could do. Another thing that benefited me was that it was a college class so you had to pass to get the credits. That was something that kept motivating me. If I didn't take this class I truly don't think I would be slightly prepared for college, CIS was a glimpse of what college class would be like. Additionally, overcoming the challenges of CIS History gave me a sense of accomplishment and confidence. As I got through difficult concepts and successfully got the challenging assignments done, my self-belief grew after a couple of months. This confidence grew on me to take on other difficult courses and academics for my overall college experience. Going into CIS was a stressful but enjoyable class that I've gone through. It had made me go through so many stages that would make me wanna drop the class but kept me going. This class was so much writing to the point that I wanted to use chatgpt but I told myself you have to do your own work in order for you to get the college credit. I will always remember the amount of work that was given to us and will later remind me that I could do any college work.